I rarely ask for anything or take anything. in general I give back more than I take. This last year has been a financial struggle so my boyfriend pays for me slightly more often than not. The last two weeks I have not taken any money from him whatsoever. In fact I have paid for dineer twice out of three times and I do not take rides from him since I don’t have a car. I walk miles inthe freezing cold so I don’t have to take him gas guzzuling car, expecially with the rise in gas prices. I don’t use the heater in my room and sleep in the cold. I buy most of the groceries. But the few occasions where we go to costco or someplace else he tells me that I am too expensive. I admitt I am not very pretty or thin so I don’t expect the kind of royal treatment that my friends get. Although they do tend to date the very honorable good looking types, whereas I’m less picky. Now that I stopped taking things from my boyfriend he gets insulted. He complains about how I forgot to turn off one light once and that he doesn’t want high utility bills. I don’t want to be a princess woman and compare myself to my prettier friends but I would like to be worth the expense to a guy. One day when I was horribly sick my boyfriend went through the trouble of paying for my medicine and the emergency room co payment. He complained three times how expensive everything was as I was lying in bed in agony. I felt bad that he spent so much money but I could barely walk and only had $10 in my account. It’s no excuse but I was dying of pain. Anyways, enough with the whinning. I know its annoying for men to always have to pay and give away half their stuff to their women, I get that. But what gives, what is a good compromise? I have since given the one drawer he gave to me back and sleep in the other room so I don’t disturb him.
My Boyfriend Often Complains That I Am Too Expensive?
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My dear, stop selling yourself short. You are equating beauty and size with worth. And those two things do not determine your worth, only your heart and mind do. Stop feeling that you deserve less because you’re not as thin or pretty as your counterparts.
Your boyfriend does not appreciate you – at all. And you have taken on the role of martyr. Why should you have to walk miles and sleep in the cold. He doesn’t. And why should you feel guilty that he spends his money on you, for whatever the occasion? He feels no guilt whatsoever when you’re spending your money on him.
Either your boyfriend is going to have to grow up, or be alone. He may have gone through the trouble of paying for the hospital and meds when you were sick, but that did not give him the right to bi*** about it while you were laying there in pain. He was not gracious about it at all.
You can work for me and I’ll pay you double the rupee’s anyone else will offer you.
He doesn’t deserve a girl like you..
GET A JOB OR A SUGAR DADDY THATS WHAT YOU NEED
Your boyfriend sounds controlling and emotionally abusive in my opinion. If you live with him, you need to try to find somewhere else to live and drop him. I know you said that you are struggling financially so I am wondering if you have a friend or relative who will be willing to help you out. You can’t go on living like this with this guy.
If you don’t live with him, just drop him and move on. Things will only get worse with him since he knows he can control you and mistreat you.
Edited to add: If you are not working, then you need to be. Just don’t take seriously though what someone said about getting a sugar daddy.
The entire time I was reading this, I noticed 2 things. One: you never say anything about him spending money on you without defending yourself in the same sentence; so, obviously you feel guilty. And two, you are trying very hard to minimize the problem, while I’m sure at the same time he’s trying to maximize it. He probably does this instinctively because he’s been told his entire life from TV, Movies, Magazines, and other men that women are greedy gold diggers that can never get enough material crap. Perhaps you should write exactly how much you’re costing him, and if the figures look favorable for you, I would present them to him as a tangible piece of evidence that you’re not very expensive at all. If it doesn’t look good on paper, you could always start calling him Napa Valley, because there is a lot of whine coming out of him.
Dump him. Sounds like a right jerk. A relationship is give and take. It’s not a case of “Well I am bringing in more money this month then you are so quit spending”
Being pretty and thin has nothing to do with how a man treats you. He clearly has no respect for you if he does things for you begrudgingly.
Why don’t he down grade his gas guzzling car if money is that tight for something that doesn’t cost the earth to run? No he’d rather just whine and blame you.
Hey, firstly find a job no matter what. Do consider a McDonalds OR Tim Hortons too!
You realize part of the problem, since you are feeling guilty.
But u firstly need some running money. Nothing will work without that, SPECIALLY if you want this relationship to continue.
It is better than selling stuff this way!!
It will automatically “increase your value” (I don’t want to sound harsh, but just being practical).
At the same time, keep looking for a job that suits your qualifications and interests.
Maybe also consider going back to your parents for sometime.
it sounds like financial difficulties may be putting a strain o yor relationship. to be honest though he doesnt sound liek a very nice guy. and the hospital thing is just ridiculous. i suggest you either take a break to have a breather from one another (or full on ditch him). easier said than done but sounds liek the way things are going the financial disputes are causing too much underlying tension and will erupt.me and my boyfriend are always broke and weve only been together around 7 months and its a strain sometimes so i get it. hope it works out.